GO THE F AWAY.

i know i've wrote about this on my blog before but the question often comes up in my head, "why does my mom seem to think she can convince people she ACTUALLY cares about me so much- she seems to think she has ANY influence whatsoever WHERE i end up in life and WHY the fuck would she think i'd EVER want to be ANYWHERE NEAR her after the neglect and abuse she has for me?" i was kicked by my dad when he MEANT to kick YOU- so you used ME as a shield while he kicks you. you also left me at your apartment numerous times ALONE when i was wheelchair-dependant to play pool at the bar. *SARCASM* IF THAT DOESN'T SHOW "CARE" THEN I DON'T KNOW WHAT DOES! you obviously don't give a fuck about me, SO WHY DON'T YOU LET ME LIVE MY LIFE THE WAY I WANT?! you're not getting ANYTHING from me anymore. i've left my money to jay when i die. SO JUST FUCKING STOP. GO PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER. i'm gonna just totally disregard your entire existance. if you were smart- you'd realize stalking me does NOT show me you "care" about me. when you put my body at risk when my dad was kicking you, it revealed just how LITTLE care and love you have for me. i've went through TWO surgeries because of YOU.. YOU'VE NEVER ONCE APOLOGIZED OR EVEN ACKNOWLEDGED YOUR PART IN MY ABUSE. I WILL NOT BE FORGIVING YOU BECAUSE YOU'RE MY MOMMY! grow the fuck up. everything doesn't revolve around you. i'm not gonna condone this shit because my surgeries PROBABLY AREN'T OVER IN MY LIFE BECAUSE YOU DECIDED TO USE MY BODY AS A SHIELD WHEN BEING KICKED BY MY DAD- WHICH I'VE DECIDED YOU MORE THAN LIKELY DESERVED JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER TIME HE HIT OR KICKED YOU BECAUSE THERE'S A LOT OF THE TIME WHERE I WISH I COULD HIT OR KICK YOU MYSELF (ONE BEING NOW) BUT SINCE MY THERAPIST GAVE ME STEPS TO DO WHEN I'M ANGRY- I'VE PRETTY MUCH MANAGED TO CONTROL MY TEMPER. I'M NOT GRANDMA. YOU DON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS SHIT WITH ME. SHE DIDN'T HAVE TO ENDURE BEING CUT OPEN TWICE SO FAR IN HER LIFE BECAUSE HER MOM IS A NARCISSISTIC BUM. THANKS TO YOUR STUPID ASS- I LOOK LIKE A VOODOO DOLL ALL STITCHED UP ON MY STOMACH WHEN I'M TOPLESS. YOU'RE NOT GONNA LOOK ANY BETTER TO YOUR OBSESSED HEIFER OF A DAUGHTER EITHER. SHE PICKED THE WRONG HORSE TO BACK. SHE SHOULD'VE PUT HER ENERGY INTO GETTING HER DAMN GED SO SHE WOULDN'T BE FUCKED ON WELFARE HER WHOLE LIFE. anyone else i need to go off on? hm.. i'll save it for when i actually think of something to get amy's fat ass wet over when she reads her cooler older sissy's blog like usual because i've determined she's the only other loser in this world who seems to idolize me because she thinks she's like me because we just happened to be damned with the same mom. if you're gonna be ANYTHING like me- i suggest you get your high school diploma.. which would probably be a ged by now since you seem to think you're so damn smart getting pregnant numerous times- the first time being at TWELVE YEARS OLD. when i was your age- I WAS MORE CONCERNED WITH SCHOOL AND SPORTS. i honestly didn't sleep with anyone for my first time right before i was 21. HEY LOOK! ONE OF THE MANY REASONS WHY YOU'LL NEVER BE LIKE ME! live your own life, skag. i'm not proud of how i got here and i'm not gonna try to make it look like i am. i don't lack intelligence like you and mom like that. i never wanna talk to either of you idiots again. you did this to yourselves. i don't even understand why mom ACTS like she actually cares about me- so she acts worried about me living my own life and living where I want. she NEVER used to give a damn about me wanting to live in new york- EVEN when i was in a wheelchair still talking about it. she used to say, "IT'S YOUR LIFE! LIVE IT LIKE YOU WANT!" so that leads me to believe that she gathered up this fake care and concern for me because she thinks it'll get her closer to my sister (who she REALLY cares about). i know damn well that she would've NEVER used my sister's body as a shield while her dad was kicking my mom. i officially hate you both for selfishly only having your best interests in mind when it comes to me living MY life. fuck off. you're not gonna get anything from stalking me except a VERY PISSED OFF STACY, who IS going to ignore your very existance from now on. maybe you two will teach each other to grow the fuck up.